And they all lived happily ever after

It's D-day tomorrow (as in defense day), and I must admit, it's a miracle that I have gotten to this point (especially considering my ever-dwindling motivation to work on the thesis anymore - meaning that I'm posting here instead of putting the finishing touches on the presentation . . . yeah). Special thanks are in order to all who have housed me or fed me or gave me work or listened to my frustrations or made me laugh or held me while I cried or just gave your love and support to me in this process. Despite my protestations otherwise, I have really enjoyed my last month in Provo.

I am amazed at how much a person can learn in a month's time. I learned that I am just a couple of inches too long to really sleep well on a couch for more than 2 nights in a row. I learned that onions and tuna are quite tasty in pasta. I learned that even my heavy winter coat (with all the subsequent layers underneath) will not keep me from freezing if I am insistent enough to sit through a snow-laden football game. I learned that LaVell Edward's Stadium looks like a snow globe when the snow is falling and the big lights are on. I was reminded of the schizophrenia of Utah's weather patterns. I learned that I will never tire of the joy I experience when seeing an old friend on campus. I learned that there is always work to be done. I learned that riding a horse will give you a better full-body workout than any gym membership. I learned that I really like to ride horses - fast horses. I learned that I can sleep on a bus. I learned that there's always time for one more laugh. I learned that while I like cats, I really am more of a dog person. I was reminded that it is worth it to make new friends, even if you aren't necessarily putting down roots in a place. I learned that Eva Cassidy has a voice that can soothe my soul. I was reminded of how much I love to teach. I learned that some people think I'm smarter than I am. I learned that it's okay to do hard things (my mom has been telling me this one for years). I learned that the longer you take to do something hard, the harder it becomes. I learned what it feels like to be at a loss for words (and to have your words not come out like you expect - a new experience for me, I assure you. I can now identify with Shakespeare's character Dogberry better than ever before). I learned that while my boots may be made for walking, my feet are not made for walking in boots for extended distances. I learned that California Pizza Kitchen is not so good two nights in a row. I learned that after having lived in Provo for about a quarter of my life, I can't really expect to go to a new ward and not see someone I know. I learned that I always overpack - even when I try underpacking, I still overpack. I learned that Angela's singing resonates directly with my tear ducts. I learned that changing in the back of a moving car with darkly tinted windows, while not the most comfortable or convenient experience, is possible. I learned that I have the best friends in the world. Okay, yeah, the last one sounds cheesy, but it's true. I know some truly incredible people (you know who you are!), and my life has been greatly enriched by the relationships I've made here. If it doesn't hurt to say good-bye, then I guess the experience wasn't worth it. But, the nice thing is, you don't really have to say good-bye . . . it's more of a see you later, and you never know when that later might be.

Things always take longer than you think

You know, flexibility was never one of my strong points. Even when I was younger and in dance classes, I could never do the splits or anything like that. I'm usually the type of person that plans, and then sticks to that plan at all costs.

Fortunately for me, some things don't go how I've planned. Like the time I thought I wanted one of those sit-behind-a-desk-and-study-while-you're-pretending-to-work jobs on campus. Things definitely didn't work how I'd planned them, and I ended up having the best job of my life working as a research assistant for a professor I'd never met before. So many blessings came from following the course I never would have seen on my own.

Well, it's turned out that this whole graduating-and-starting-life thing that I had planned on doing in August has taken much longer than anticipated. I went home for a couple days expecting to start my new job right away. A couple of days turned into a couple of weeks - for reasons out of my control - and at first it really bothered me to reply with "I don't know" when people would ask how long I'm in town for. Now, I have returned to my Alma Mater in an attempt to actually cross all my t's and dot all my i's and have a defended thesis. But, after a month of living out of a suitcase at home, the adventure of it all has set in.

I don't know how long I'll be in Utah. Or even what stage of thesis-dom will be attained during this visit. The amazing thing is this: I don't care. I don't care that it's not done yet. I don't care that I have no idea when I'll be defending, when I'll be moving, or when my job will actually start. It's a liberating feeling. Of course, now that I'm free I'll get to grow in some other area. In the meantime, we're on month two out of the suitcase. We'll see if I can make it to three.